Ten things we learned this week: 18 December 2015 edition

We could only ever kick this week’s Ten Things off on a festive note. Boys and girls (but only the ones in the good list), may we present the Jaguar F-Sleigh.

According to Jag, its sleigh takes inspiration from the F-Type, but with “skates in place of wheels, a generous open luggage compartment for gifts and jet power to generate Jaguar’s renowned supercharged performance through the night sky.

“A Growler-embossed red nose completes the F-Sleigh’s Christmas theme,” the bumf continues, in a turn of events that rather makes us fear for Rudolph and Co.

But given the F-Sleigh has unwisely been constructed from ice, we don’t fancy its chances of emerging from present drops much far south of Santa’s Lapland HQ.

Christmas contains many good things, notably presents and general mirth. It has its bad sides too, such as TV schedule-based fallouts and drink driving.

The latter is an unfortunate downside of all the parties, as even studious drivers get lenient with their own standards when a mulled wine is waved in front of them.

One man suspected of such a misdemeanour in Tadcaster, North Yorkshire, was spied by police and a short chase promptly began.

After crashing his Mini into a barrier, he made haste on foot, stumbling across a nativity scene and promptly concealing himself - albeit unsuccessfully - in the hay. Not such a wise man.

Picture credit: Thorvaldsson

Last week Ten Things told you about a good-natured crowdfunding campaign to buy the two millionth Land Rover Defender. A Defender built by numerous important names, and being flogged for charity, don’t forget.

The online effort reached £1,500 before the auction. It won’t surprise you to learn that wasn’t enough to buy the Defender. It might surprise you to learn that nothing short of £400,000 was enough to buy it. Eek.

It’s gone to an unnamed bidder in Qatar, so the crowdfunders’ efforts to keep it in the UK have well and truly fallen flat. We doubt Red Cross and Born Free will mind though, as their coffers swell considerably…

This year’s final celebrity/car tie-up comes from Lexus and actor Jude Law.

As well as being in the advert for the new RX soft-roader, “Jude Law will work closely with Lexus to enable consumers to immerse themselves and be immersed in The Life RX through interactive videography and theatre.” No, we don’t know what that means either.

Perhaps Law himself can explain? “The team at Lexus envisioned bringing something to life that was immersive and included everyone on the journey, and this was something I was keen to explore.”

If he’s insisted on being paid purely in LFAs, we might just forgive him this poppycock.

Thought camera sales would be falling flat now every smartphone has one? Nissan begs to differ: it sells comfortably over 3,000 of the things every day.

They aren’t being snapped up by selfie addicts, though; rather, they’re all attached to cars.

The Juke, Qashqai and X-Trail can have up to five cameras fitted to help with the various parking and safety systems.

And Nissan’s mass camera production is only set to rise, with the devices pivotal to the launch of self-driving crossovers. #nofilter

Compared to kneeling beneath the Eiffel Tower in the city of love, or choosing the half time period of a big sports match, this man’s attempts at nailing down a wife are quite middle of the road.

Literally. Vidal Valladares Navas chose the centre of the Interstate 45 highway in Houston, the site of other half-to-be Michelle Wycoff’s favourite view. He had friends block the traffic with their cars to make it all a bit less dicey.

Wycoff said yes, but the champers is likely on hold for now. The local feds have taken an unromantic approach to Navas’s efforts, and he’s being charged with ‘obstruction of highway’, which can carry a 180-day jail term.

Police weren’t called to the scene, but hapless Navas posted his joy on Instagram, and the charges have since followed. Oops…

Regular Ten Things fans will know we’re a bit obsessed with Lewis’s potential music career. He doesn’t half bang on about it, after all.

A mere week after telling James Corden that his mix tape lands soon, and Lew’s tour of the American telly big guns has given us our first aural glimpse at his choons.

Here you can see him with Charlie Rose on 60 Minutes, playing snippets of ‘J’adore’ and ‘Lookin’ at you’.

“It’s very serious, we spend a lot of time here,” Hammo tells Rose as he sits in the studio, unable to resist miming along to his own music in front of the cameras.

We invite your thoughts below…

This week, the whizzy, high-tech configurator for a fast British convertible launched. That convertible is the McLaren 675LT Spider.

But a slightly less whizzy, lower-tech configurator has also launched, for a different British convertible. This time it’s the Morgan Aero 8.

It’s more technical than a quill and scroll, though, which may surprise some of you. And it’s also jolly good fun. Taste need not be a barrier to your creation, which is half the fun when you can’t afford the car you’re crafting, right?

…but there is a bonkers tuned version of Lambo’s littlest supercar.

A few weeks ago we caught a glimpse of these sneaky spy shots, and got all worked up about a stripped-out Huracan in the vein of its Gallardo forebear.

The bad news is it’s not a Superleggera. The good news? That shiny blue bespoilered Huracan is, in fact, something by tuner Novitec.

Something with 860bhp, a whole Focus ST more than standard thanks to the addition of a supercharger to the Huracan’s V10 engine.

A muscular car needs a muscular name, of course, and it’s been christened the Huracan N-Largo. Your thoughts?

But we hope he doesn’t, else they’ll all run out soon. This - and far, far more - can be found out by plugging the value of your car and your salary into this mildly depressing number cruncher.

Here you can find out how frequently the world’s top-earning football kickers are able to buy your car, and how long it would take you to buy theirs, from Rolls Phantom to LaFerrari.

The most startling news? Mario Balotelli, a man famous for letting fireworks off in hotel rooms and visiting a prison simply for a look around, owns a Ferrari F12 Berlinetta. Which is famous for being a right old flipping handful.

Give him a wide berth…