It’s Top Gear Formula One bingo!

It won't have escaped your notice - how could it possibly have escaped your notice - that it's the British Grand Prix this weekend. The gates to the campsites are open at Silverstone, as they are at Glastonbury and guess what? There's no sign of any mud in either.

So as the papers and television scramble around for something different to photograph, we thought we'd bring back our much loved, Top Gear Formula One bingo spot. Whether you are there at Silverstone, or channel hopping between the F1 and Wimbledon (heaven forbidanyone might be doing any actual, you know, work), here's our exclusive preview of what will be keeping the photo-editors on their guard between now and Monday.

Eddie Jordan's increasingly flirtatious attitude to Suzi Perry creating ever greater on-screen tension with David Coulthard

Lots of mentions of James Hunt. Look out especially for people claiming ‘I was there for the riot in at Brands in 1976...' when they weren't

Worn and faded Nigel Mansell T-shirts tested to destruction over massive beer bellies. Likewise knackered old Nige' sun hats forced back into action

A three-line - or more - whip of McLaren PR people making sure an increasingly off-message Jenson Button stays on-message

Distressing levels of sunburn to arms and necks and aforementioned bellies. Alternatively, mud like you've never seen outside Glasto

Eddie Jordan's ruddy band. And everyone pretending to enjoy it

Sir Mick Jagger spotted in the pits on Saturday, apparently unaware that he should actually be somewhere else

Sudden interest in Lewis' dog Roscoe from animal welfare campaigners. We suspect this may lead the Mail online all weekend

The Tabloids discovering Max Chilton: "There are FOUR Brits in F1, you know, alongside Lewis and Jenson and that Grumpy One from Scotland..."

That ‘Grumpy One from Scotland' being asked about the chances of formerly leading Scots Grump and now Nation's Favourite, Andy Murray

Martin Brundle not being able to resist beaming about his boy's great drive at Le Mans last weekend. Nice one Alex

Sky and BBC trying to outdo each other with those increasingly irritating films where Eddie Jordan/Damon Hill read some O-level poetry over archive footage

David Coulthard making out to everyone that he wasn't a very good driver when we all know he was

Martin Brundle (and everyone) talking about how special the Silverstone fans are and how they make the race

Jake Humphrey making his first trip to Silverstone since opting for relative obscurity over fame and adulation

MASSIVE love for Murray Walker, everywhere, including here. We wish you the very best over the coming months