Gallery: behind-the-scenes on our trip to India

A keenly priced Mini, Roller and Jag. In India. What could POSSIBLY go wrong

Note the donkey. I SAID NOTE THE DONKEY

Moments after Jeremy discovered you could use a Corby trouser press to cook naan bread. No, really

James May and a Rolls Royce - an expensive, flatulent and less reliable alternative to the elephant

Drum ‘n' space, grace and pace

OI OI!! BRITS ABROAAAAAAD!!!

Our British goods stall looks a bit... rubbish

This is how James relaxes after filming

The boys' Justin Beiber covers went down superbly

Background man flashes BLUE STEEL

Power is nothing without EXHAUST PIPES

Minis were born for rallying. Jag and Roller? Not so much...

The mighty Allegro joins TG's forfeit ranks

Paddy Hopkirk did not endorse these accessories

SPY SHOT - Jag's new off-roader caught testing

There is nothing unusual about this picture. At all

Hey look! It's the Lake Palace Hotel from Octopussy!

"Swapsies?" asks James

Mirror, signal, AAARRRRRGGGGHHH!

Queuing - the finest British import... in the world

Big fish, little fish, cardboard box

Stowage space. The Mini has none

Big cat, little gaps

That's not a double bass - it's a violin

Yes, man on the right - we can see you picking your nose

India's finest takes on Britain's foulest

"One looooove, for the city streets, one looooove, for the hip hop beats..."

[Insert people carrier joke here]

This is a man on an elephant

"No Richard, I haven't stolen your whitening kit"

If you gotta go, you gotta go

Rolls Royce gets in the spirit of 'Movember'

Bass - how high can you go?

Rickshaw fun bus was a hit with the locals

An amused Jeremy Clarkson, sometime earlier

Biscuits and salad cream: the lunch of champions

Water fight was a necessity

They were all smiles at first...

Jeremy's post-song breakdance was strictly not for telly

'Delhi belly' attack couldn't have come at a worse time

Our illustrious convoy

Some men with hats making Fire.

Carries four in 'comfort'

Jag's 4.0-litre straight-six tackles some Indian terrain