Everything you need to know about new cars this week

When do we get it? In the UK now, if your pockets are deep enough.

What we say: “There are crystal-effect taillights, a new two-tone grille treatment, and unique 21-inch polished alloy wheels.

“And this is merely the starting point. If you want more overt personalization, SVO’s bespoke department will swing into action. Apparently one client has commissioned unique ‘suicide’ coach doors, and SVO has happily obliged.”

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When do we get them? Hopefully soon, possibly never. Time to whip up the placards and campaign to your Mazda dealer.

What we say: “The Speedster slices nearly 200 kilos from its base car’s kerb weight, tipping the scales at a mere 943kg thanks to its complete lack of roof. Mazda describes it as ‘a study in the extremes of lightweight, purpose-built performance’.

“Those of a less track-biased disposition are likely to prefer the Spyder, meanwhile, which appears to have taken a leaf from the book of Porsche’s identically suffixed Boxster.”

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When do we get it? It’s a one off, so we don’t. Sorry. 

What we say: “Ever wanted a lesson in the importance of conserving your momentum in corners? This car wrote the syllabus.

“What we didn’t expect was rather than the lack of acceleration spoiling the experience, it simply forces you to attack it from another angle: concentrating hard, steering smoothly and picking your braking points and braking force to perfection.”

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When do we get it? We don’t. But lucky US residents with $99,990 rattling around do.

What we say: “It’s been developed by Ford Performance as a proper factory-built, turnkey racing car. It’s eligible for many classes of national and international drag racing, along with other classes in hot rod associations.

“No power output has been specified, but Ford reckons fresh out of the box, it’ll hit a quarter mile in eight seconds. Therefore, we suspect the horsepower figure is officially ‘many’.”

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When do we get it? It’s on sale now, for £60,459 – around £6,500 more than a Boxster GTS.

What we say: “It does the ‘Ring in 7.47, but that’s not the point at all. This is an indulgent car, one you totally engage with, relishing the whole operation of it, not just the handling’s outer limits.

“It’ll go down a road as rabidly as you crave, but it’s actually nicest when you back the pace off a bit and concentrate on driving it properly, y’know getting the braking and gearchanging just so.”

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When do we get it? It arrives in the UK next March. Wager on at least £50,000 for one.

What we say: “The one we’re interested in is the GLS 63 AMG, which now comes with a heady 577bhp from its 5.5-litre V8.

“No word on performance yet, but the old 549bhp car could manage 168mph with the limiter relaxed. Not bad at all...”

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When do we get it? No word at all yet. It’s a concept for now.

What we say: “Now, we know what you’re thinking: ‘How are we meant to do stonking donuts and drifts with all-wheel-drive?’ Well, as Ken Block has proved with his four-wheel-drive Hoonicorn, sending power to all corners of a muscle car doesn’t destroy the fun.

“Same goes for this Challenger, as an insider told us, ‘when it’s a little wet, you can light up all four easily’. That’s the right answer.”

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When do we get it? Right now, priced from £58,960.

What we say: “You’re aware of the weight if hurling the XJR around, but the smooth, quick and precise steering imbues it with a degree of agility reminiscent of cars a class or two smaller.

“And in the R, sideways is a only a tiny poke of the throttle away….”

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When do we get it? Not sure. 2017 perhaps? Best get saving now… 

What we say: “It is, admittedly, unusual behaviour for a company like Bugatti to allow a trio of undisguised hypercar prototypes to be snapped on public roads, but frankly we’re not complaining.

“The only question is, just how fast will the Veyron’s successor go? Are you looking at the world’s first 280mph-plus production car?”

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Image credit: Erico Hessel on Instagram / ericohesselphotography.com

When do we get it? You can have one now, so long as you’ve a Ghibli to hand and much money to mod it with.

What we say: “There are additional spoilers and splitters, all crafted from Mansory’s favourite material, carbon fibre.

“But don’t they look subtle? Were Maserati to give the Ghibli some wild MC Stradale treatment it would likely resemble something like this; casual observers will be hard pushed to tell you’ve been shopping with the people who brought you the eye-hating Sahara.”

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