Volkswagen Tayron review

We’ll keep this brief, because if we run through all the trim and powertrain permutations you’ll be here all day.

Things kick off with the mild-hybrid engine for £39,850. As a rule of thumb, stepping up to the diesel will only cost you a grand more; the entry plug-in hybrid is a £4k jump above base.

Base-spec Life trim gets 18s, LED headlights with high beam assist, the 12.9in touchscreen, a rear-view camera, adaptive cruise control, wireless phone charging with Apple CarPlay and Android auto, plus ambient lighting with 10 colours.

Next up is Match trim for £44,405: it can only be had with the lowlier PHEV and adds fancier 18s, a panoramic sunroof, parking assistance, an electric tailgate, tinted windows and silver windows. This one’s if you want e-range on a budget.

Then, er, it’s back down to Elegance spec for £42,400 and up. In come 19s, an overhead view camera, the park assistance, heated front seats with massage function, that electric tailgate, keyless entry, 30 ambient lighting colours and an illuminated VW logo on the bonnet. That’ll catch people’s attention, not least at your local insurance firm, who’ll probably be upping your premiums for it as we speak. D’oh.

R-Line costs from £42,850 and is the only place where you can choose between all six powertrains. It gets 20in alloys, R-Line style bumpers and chrome, plus dynamic headlights and sports seats.

Finally, you’ve got R-Line Edition for £47,380 and up (because you can only pair it with the PHEVs). How does more expensive 20s, an even more panoramic panoramic sunroof, and parking assistance with memory function take your fancy?

Make it easy for me, which should I choose?

If you must have seven seats then get the beefiest 2.0-litre petrol and thank us later. But if five will do, the lower-powered PHEV in Match trim looks like the best deal. That one promises 76 miles of e-range, which could slash your running costs if you’ve got easy access to charging at home. And the prospect of mostly e-running in an already quiet car feels too good to turn down. Adaptive suspension is standard on the PHEV too, so that solves another dilemma. We’ve not tested it yet, mind.

The 15in touchscreen can only be had with a pack that bundles in a HUD (£625 on its own) and more powerful USB-Cs for £1,130. You can probably do without. Same goes for the £900 Harman Kardon sound system, unless you’re really into your podcasts and tunez.