Porsche Cayenne Coupe review

The Cayenne Coupe starts at £73,300, followed by the E-Hybrid, costing from £81,900. Next up is the S Coupe, which starts from £88,100, followed by the S E-Hybrid, which’ll set you back from £90,100.

The GTS slots in next at £104,900, before you get to the Turbo E-Hybrid, costing from £132,600. Top of the tree is the Turbo E-Hybrid with GT Package, which starts from £154,000. 

Oh, and just FYI, each Cayenne Coupe is roughly three grand more than its equivalent SUV. Got all that? Good.

Will speccing one give me a headache?

More than likely, and that’s before you’ve even begun to ponder gold door stickers or Deep Sea Blue 22in wheels regardless of exterior colour (yes, really).

Once you’ve decided which of its half-dozen powertrain options to choose from – the halo Turbo more than doubling the power of the base car – it’s time to work out whether you want four or five seats, the latter unable to be twinned with that Lightweight Sport Package (and its carbon roof and natty houndstooth trim). But if you’re thinking of occasionally carrying an extra person then also carting around the 22kg that kit saves will hardly be a concern.

Standard equipment whatever version you go for includes matrix LED headlights, panoramic roof, eight-way electric heated front seats, keyless start, cruise control, reversing camera, Apple CarPlay and Android Auto and a 10-speaker hi-fi.

Is Porsche as stingy with options as ever?

Yep. Even on the mighty £154k GT package car you’ll have to pay another £1,325 for rear-axle steering, a chief component to making big ol’ cars handle well. Isn’t it wild they’d put all that effort into widening tracks and cutting 100kg from the thing to then let you skip four-wheel steer?

Ceramic brakes are mercifully standard on the GT, but a seven grand option elsewhere. We’d skip the two grand sports exhaust option on all engines: Porsche makes such decent powertrains in the first place, their aural appeal doesn’t need an artificial boost.