Road Test: Audi RS3 2.5 TFSI RS 3 Quattro 5dr S Tronic

Yes, the RS3 will do sideways. This was, in fairness, no more than Audi promised. Seemingly piqued by suggestions that its fast stuff – not least the old RS3 – was too nose-led, too understeery to appeal to the Dedicated Helmsman brigade, Ingolstadt has, for the last few months, been bigging up the capacity of the all-new RS3 for wanton, lusty oversteer, highlighting the ability of its quattro set-up to chuck 100 per cent of the torque to the rear axle. The RS3’s press gumph even promises the possibility of “controlled drifts”. Not a phrase you often find in an Audi press release.

They weren’t fibbing. The RS3 will do sideways. Even in the stumpy mitts of TopGear, it can be coaxed into great steady-state drifts, front wheels counter-canted to daft angles as the five-cylinder engine yowls its familiar retro soundtrack. Sideways? Can do.

With one proviso. Yes, the RS3 will do sideways... on ice. For ice is the only surface upon which we had the chance to test the RS3, a great frozen rink way up in the Arctic Circle, with a grip coefficient somewhat lower than a bar of soap. If you can’t get drifty here, you can’t get drifty anywhere.

So yes, the RS3 will do sideways on ice, but that is really all we know. We cannot tell you if the MQB-based hot hatch will handle broken British tarmac with greater aplomb than the brittle old RS3, nor if the variable electric steering shall offer any clue as to what the front wheels are up to.

We can tell you, at least, that power should not be an issue, for this is the most powerful hot hatch on sale. The five-cylinder turbo makes an unprecedented 362bhp, a convenient few horsepowers north of the 354bhp Merc A45 – with Audi conservatively promising a 0–62mph time of 4.3 seconds. We can tell you that throttle response seems cracking: that with maximum torque available from just 1,650rpm, the five-door-only RS3 serves up a genuine gut-punch of power anywhere in the rev range. We can tell you that it sounds cracking, and that both the seven-speed double-clutch ’box (no manual option is available) and quattro set-up feel far quicker-witted and more natural than those of the frequently ponderous A45. But that is really all we can tell you.

Yes, the RS3 will do sideways, but we cannot tell you whether it will be worth its £10,000 premium over the VW Golf R, a car with a monstrous appetite for bad British roads. We look forward to finding out. For now, we can tell you only this: the RS3 will do sideways.