The new Nissan Patrol looks absolutely GARGANTUAN

Nissan’s dedicated Middle Eastern Twitter account is using #ConquerEverywhere to market the new Patrol – and it’s pretty easy to see why.

The Patrol is absolutely massive. The previous generation was over five-metres long, almost two metres wide and 1.9m tall. It could quite possibly conquer absolutely everywhere it went. There’d certainly be no arguments from other road users.

And now there’s a new one, and it looks equally as giant. The loveable, slab-sided styling is still present, but there’s a slightly-redesigned grille and new boomerang front and rear lights. Nissan describes it as a “striking new design”. You will likely have your own vernacular to decipher it.

Under the bonnet, discerning customers can have either a 4.0-litre V6 that puts out 271bhp and 291lb ft of torque, or a full-fat 5.6-litre V8 with 395bhp and 413lb ft. The Middle East is the biggest market for the Patrol, presumably because it can just drink fuel straight from the ground or something.

That V8 can also be paired with something called Hydraulic Body Motion Control in order to reduce vibration and road noise, whilst the 4WD system is switchable to cope with different off-road conditions.

Inside there’s new quilted leather and a hand-stitched steering wheel, as well as a dual-screen setup with Apple CarPlay and Android Auto.

The new Patrol will soon go on sale in the Middle East, and soon after in other markets. Wait! The old one, somehow, got a Nismo version – we’ll wait for that one thanks Nissan.