Dirty toys: Suzuki Jimny vs Dacia Duster

There’s something about the SUV that the most vehemently proud petrolheads find repulsive. Well, there are doubtless numerous things, but it’s perhaps the sheer frivolousness of rather too many examples of the breed that really grates.

Cars that are more bloated in size and weight than a regular hatchback or saloon, with the unavoidable penalties on performance, fuel consumption and plain cost, but without any tangible gain in practicality beyond a higher driving position. Which people who love driving will want to ratchet down to the floor anyway.

The Dacia Duster and Suzuki Jimny are exceptions, though. They’re not really SUVs, for starters, with no real semblance of ‘sport’ to questionably tack onto their undoubted ‘utility’. Above all, though, they feel honest.

They’re cars which aren’t – for a single second – pretending to be anything they’re not. People who love driving can enjoy these significantly more guilt-free than they can a Stelvio or Macan, even if their handling prowess falls far short of an Alfa or Porsche.

The Duster has been a familiar name (and TG favourite) for years. While this is a new, slightly fancier looking version, it’s as outrageously cheap as ever. Getting any brand-new car for £9,995 is an achievement nowadays, let alone one so commodious and capable across multiple surfaces.

Though with some inevitability we’re testing one that costs a full 54 per cent more, the extra cash covering air con, a stereo and (the height of luxury) electric rear windows, as well as a 114bhp 1.5-litre diesel engine for those who want to live parsimoniously beyond the showroom.

It remains front-wheel drive – upgrading it to a 4x4 adds another £2,000 – but unless you’ve big adventures planned, there’s more than enough tyre tread, ground clearance and sheer gumption for this one to haul you around with little fuss.

The Jimny starts at an almost hypercar-like £15,499 in comparison, though every single version comes with DAB, a suite of safety systems and a properly rock-scrabbling four-wheel-drive system, one with low-range gearing and hill-descent control. This SZ5 adds nav, heated seats and alloy wheels for another £2500.

There’s just one engine choice – a 100bhp 1.5-litre petrol that might still feel weedy alongside an overworked seaside donkey – but you quickly learn the wee Suzuki doesn’t really stand up to regular, objective scrutiny.

“Slow steering, baggy gearchange, lethargic engine.” It’s most pertinent to take you through my brief iPhone notes of driving the Jimny on the road because, hey, that’s not where it wants (or was designed) to be. It’s like criticising a BAC Mono for its inability to safely carry out the school run.

It’s possible to wear a broad grin on your face if you provide the right level of commitment, however. With such a narrow, short body, absurd visibility by modern standards – including a view of the whole bonnet, increasingly a USP – you can have quite inappropriate levels of fun in a car that makes extremely modest speeds feel quite wild indeed, much like a classic Mini does.

Leave a tarmacked surface and you needn’t worry about grabbing any of the 4WD levers unless you’re really going off grid, such is the ease of guiding something so narrow, light and willing over rocks, through mud or via just about any surface you reckon its front bumper will clear.

Now, I must point out the Jimny's always done this. The outgoing car never garnered the adoration of the motoring press (or an eighteen-month waiting list) like its replacement has, and my inner cynic was appalled that simply making something cute and retro would impress our tarty nation so much. The old one was crap on road and brilliant off it, but no one cooed over its less doe-eyed looks, so it lived as a recluse.

Turns out I’m a tart too. It’s an irresistible object, one that shakes the cynicism out of me in mere moments. There’s pleasing detailing beyond the Micro Machine G-Wagen looks, too; the badge’s natty font, robustly shaped dials, a Jesus handle in front of the passenger. It’s not just a lazy retro rehash, there’s thought behind it.

There’s also a comical lack of practicality beyond wipe-clean surfaces and its van-like nature when you flip the rear seats down, mind, and little to no elbow room up front. You’ll almost certainly get unintentionally intimate with your front passenger.

The Suzuki is as laser-focused on its core strength as a Caterham, categorising its ability to ‘roughly carry more than one person’ and ‘probably not make you deaf on the motorway’ as mere bonus material. Whereas the Duster is more about broad appeal, with a similar love for lolloping around in the mud as the Jimny, just without turning a blind eye to the stuff that matters every day.

The Duster feels like a precision instrument after Jimny, in fact, its steering light, quick and precise, its gearchange as sharp as a racing sequential in comparison and its suspension appearing to produce some new-fangled concept called ‘ride quality’.

It’s so much more developed as road car but still exhibits charm and cheeriness like the Jimny. It just adds some very welcome refinement, sitting at 70mph like most hatchbacks and seating five people and many of their things without a jot of stress.

This diesel very much fits the cut-price Dacia mind-set; without a single eye on the environment we got the trip computer to 52mpg, making its claimed 64mpg borderline pessimistic if you drive with a lighter foot. But a petrol, namely the Duster’s new 1.2-litre turbo, will make it quieter and calmer to live with, and would be our choice.

Naturally there are trade-offs going for the budget choice of this pair, the Duster possessing a bleakly grey interior that uses a media system about a decade behind even the Jimmy’s. And that’s if you’ve stumped up for a spec level that doesn’t come with the ominous sounding “pre-wiring for accessory-fit radio and speaker system”. That’s ‘bugger all’ in plain English.

There’s just a bit less panache about the Dacia. It’s not nearly as covetable as the Suzuki. But then what is? These two will please the enthusiast in equal measure, just in different ways. Think of the Jimny as a toy for two (it’s a practical four-seater in the same way a 911 is) that’ll go unfathomably far away from civilisation, while the Duster is a genuine do-it-all family car with a less adventurous attitude, but for much less money.

The latter’s complete lack of pretence leaves me more besotted, but its luridly painted rival has proved a lot more charming than I’d dare hope. Compared to the increasingly ubiquitous crossover they both feel refreshingly honest and completely faithful to their brief. Rest assured there’s not an ounce of frivolousness between them.

Dacia Duster Comfort dCi 115

8/10

£15,395
1461cc turbodiesel 4cyl, 114bhp, 192lb ft
6spd manual, front-wheel drive
0-62mph in 10.5sec, 111mph
64.2mpg, 115g/km CO2
1205kg

Suzuki Jimny SZ5

7/10

£17,999
1462cc 4cyl, 100bhp, 95lb ft
5spd manual, four-wheel drive
0-62mph in 12.5secs (est), 90mph
35.8mpg, 178g/km CO2
1135kg