Gallery: 20 sad scrappage scheme victims

Scrappage schemes are back. And you thought they'd been and gone in the late 2000s. Last time such an incentive gripped the nation, the UK government had the good honesty to reveal every single car destroyed under the scheme, designed to kick-start the British auto sector by offering punters £2,000 to trade in their old bangers for shiny new metal.

But, after a quick glance through the list of nearly 400,000 giffers that bit the dust, TG felt the need to lie down in a quiet room and have a cry.

Principally because it reveals there are people in the world who believe a BMW 635 CSI deserved to be destroyed permanently. Sure, we can understand the old Vauxhall Novas and the Daihatsu Terioseses and the Fiat Cinquecentos and even the 492 BMW 318s, but an Alfa Romeo Spider?

For the love of all that's holy, what possessed you people to bin four CAPRI LASERS, over forty Ford Escort Mexicos and a Lancia Fulvia? Shame on you.

Our anger is compounded by some of the classifications on the official document, which have led to much fevered scratching of heads. Particularly the entry ‘VOLVO BMW 7 SERIES'. Or the ‘VOLKSWAGEN PROTON PERSONA MERIDIAN', so the numbers that follow in this gallery must be taken with a pinch of salt.

Even so, meet 20 victims of the 2009 scrappage scheme that really, really didn't deserve to die.

Fourteen original Quattros bit the dust. Fourteen! Don't you know Gene Hunt said, 'Fire up the Quattro', not 'Fire the Quattro'?

It's a landmark car for BMW, one of a series of Beemers largely credited with turning around the company's fortunes. WHO IS THIS PERSON?

The 635 CSI is one of the coolest cars BMW ever built. Now there are 13 fewer of them in the world. Sad face.

Clearly, it didn't matter to four people out there that the M535i WAS THE VERY FIRST M5. Top Gear's caps lock button is under severe strain.

A brief history of the mighty BMW M5

Really? Four of these classic fast Fords had to meet their maker? Why?

Only recently did we bring you Honda's (mostly) excellent back catalogue of Type Rs, and one stands more excellent than the rest. To the two that have gone, RIP.

A brief history of Honda's Type R

Words. Words have failed us.

Mazda has yet to replicate the excellence of the original RX-7, with its rotary engine and monster power. Clearly this didn't deter ten automotive sadists.

A proper Big Benz in every sense, the 560 SEC packed a mighty V8. Farewell, chaps.

This was up against the Ford Capri back in the day. Are the memories flooding back yet? No? Well now they can't, because you KILLED ALL THE CARS.

When these 32 cars bit the dust, the 205 GTI was celebrating its 25th birthday. Why do the good die so young?

Like older brother 205, this was a really rather excellent GTI. Still a pretty car, too. Sorry. WAS a pretty car.

A stripped out 306 GTI? What's wrong with that? Sure, it was probably a bit leaky and electrical-faulty by 2009, but we'd have taken it off your hands.

Again, words have failed us. Go take a long look at yourself, Britain.

If we're honest, we're surprised that - between the crashes and mechanical faults so common to 5 Turbos - this pair even survived the 1980s.

An Impreza Turbo is a relative bargain these days, with relatively scruffy ones going for around two grand. But this pair would have to have been irreparably scruffy to stop their loss being an untold disaster.

A rally-bred Toyota. Shame on you.

Toyota has been making noises about a new Supra, but this one was still a Mighty Thing back in the 1990s. Thirty-one baseball-cap-wearing helmsmen should hang their head in shame.

The sole TVR we could find in the list. Presumably because all the others have already gone.

Do you people understand how rare the VR6 Corrados are? Do you? Well, they're a whole lot rarer now.

Got a few hours to dig through every car lost to the cruel scrappage scheme? Head over here, and then tell us what you've found on the RIP list...