Red Bull to swap Laurent Mekies with new team principal at Belgian GP

Here’s TopGear.com’s roving correspondent, Cory Spondent, with his mostly incorrect exclusives from the world of motoring

Red Bull Racing will swap incoming team principal Laurent Mekies with new Racing Bulls boss Alan Permane at the Belgian Grand Prix, insiders have revealed.

Following Christian Horner’s shock firing earlier this week, Mekies will enjoy a full fortnight in charge of the main Red Bull Formula One team before being unceremoniously dumped ahead of the next race.

And should Permane’s appointment not yield an immediate 1-2 finish at the famous Spa-Francorchamps circuit for drivers Max Verstappen and Yuki Tsunoda, he too will be jettisoned in favour of an algorithm soaked in the company’s famous energy drink.

“We are proud to announce Laurent Mekies’ appointment as the new CEO and team principal of Red Bull Racing,” an insider added, “but it will be difficult to see him struggle with the RB21 and as a result we have collectively taken the decision to make an early switch.

“This is a purely sporting decision. Ignore the fact he has yet to commandeer the team over a full race weekend, because we just can’t take the risk that he’ll be unable to do the impossible and immediately lead Verstappen and Tsunoda to the top two steps of the podium.

“So thank you for your service, Laurent, you will forever be a part of this team’s history. And we look forward to firing Alan Permane in another fortnight after both Max and Yuki start the inevitable slide into the midfield."

Meanwhile the RB21 has been told it will lose its place on the grid if its performances don't significantly improve, with Racing Bulls' car ready to be promoted from the junior team if called upon.