‘Squirrels smashed my windscreen’

Facing an uncomfortable phonecall with the windscreen repair person? Simples - ‘it woz the squirrels wot did it'.

Pathetic, yes, but it's one of many heard by Autoglass, which this week brought out a list of wacky excuses used to cover up cracked windscreens.

This list includes the vigilante mother-in-law seeking revenge via baseball bat, a UFO falling out of the sky, and the stiletto from a lady's shoe. Quite what the lady was doing at the time for her heel to hit the windscreen is anyone's guess. Potholing?

And beware if you ever manage to annoy a farmer by repeatedly parking in his driveway. He may just come back, drag your car into his nearby field, and pummel it mercilessly with an axe.

What about you lot? Have you ever had to devise a cunning excuse to mask your own driving-related incident? Let us know in the handy box below.